Self-Care Blog #2:

Today, I am going to share my thoughts on finding a purpose in life whether a not, it comes to love, relationships, family, friends and even your own job. 

I was reading a book that is called, ‘Ikigai’ which is introduced by a friend (he didn’t even read on it, Lmao). That book focused on the importance of discovering your ‘Ikigai’ (purpose) in your life.

About the Book, ‘Ikigai’

The book, ‘Ikigai’ has elaborated more on little stories of people who have gone through pain, loss of loved ones and how they dealt with this painful issue. It is not easy.


While reading the book, it somehow makes me feel ashamed of my good life that I am living in right now, although I am working at Starbucks as a part-timer despite graduating from a good college. 

It is really hard because everyone around me including my parents were advising me to find a better job with good salary with my Diploma certificate. I have also given much thought to this issue, “How is my future going to be like? Will I be able to afford a unit and even adopt cats?” With this kind of salary right now at 7 bucks per hour, it is totally impossible but I cannot quit rashly. 

You Are a BADASS, afterall.

You are a BADASS,
written by Jen Sincero

However, there is another self-care book called, ‘You are a BADASS’ written by Jen Sincero which has enlightened me to be a total badass! I want to be a total BADASS and have my life to be what I want it to be! This is not wrong at all. 

Nothing matters than the importance of mental health and leading a good life for myself. This is not being greedy though. Right? You definitely want to date a good guy so go ahead. Take your time! 

You will definitely want to travel then go ahead! Save up and plan along the way! If you prefer New York, then plan for it and do not just say it without doing anything about it.

Act on it!

Do not blindly sell your SOUL for MONEY

Since high school, I did experienced normal dating despite my hearing loss, well, who said deaf cannot date, right?

I have gone through dating relationships until after my graduation, I made a wrong decision. I have joined the worst online website ever which is called, ‘The Seeking Arrangement’ whereby you get to know sugar daddy or sugar mummy to gain a transactional kind of relationship. 

Both parties get to gain something from each other. After I have joined in, indeed I met a few men but it seems to be addictive and did not seem right for me.

It was like ‘not right and clean’ plus it might affect my future relationship – a normal kind without money involved. No more loneliness and no more meeting more than one man. Unlike sugaring relationship.

This is not what I want. Until, I have got anal warts recently that this is something that has taught me much about life. My life has been the way I have blindly gone through, step by step without anyone telling me like, “Hey, what is your goal? What do you want to be? What is your passion in life?” 

It was all along about money! Money! Money!

It totally sucks! Likewise, why do I need to work for money? Is becoming rich the real intention for this lifetime? Maybe for you, yes if you have gone through dirt poor during your childhood but will you be satisfied? Will you be truly happy or lonely? 

Money can be the one who is paying for my bills, food, transportation and all other expenses but that it is. I need more of happiness, develop a good mental health and helps others to reduce the level of committing suicides. 

We can still develop Mental Health if we stay within the Comfort Zones, Why?

How can we develop a mental health if we stay within the comfort zones? We should be happy and comfortable instead of suffering from mental health. 

Well, if you are feeling lost, empty and worried just before bed then you better do something.

If you are somehow worried about money, love relationship or your own health just before bed then it is your fault.

You are not putting in enough efforts. 

From the book ‘Ikigai’, it has shown that you will develop diseases (mental health is one of them) if you do not exercise your brain. Make good use of your brain, take up a new skill and learn it step by step to exercise your brain. 

It is also kinda give you a new purpose in life!

Open yourself up to new opportunities and you will definitely discover new purposes in your life.

I believed that we all have the right to outlive our life. 

Find Your Dream Job, it is not as Easy as you think!

Likewise, I have stated that I am working at Starbucks and it is a really tiring job for me. Every night, my wrists, my knuckles and fingers ached badly till the next day and I have that thought of quitting immediately!

But I need money. I need it to pay off old debts before signing myself up for courses to find a dream job for myself. I love to explore arts, chat up with new people and in return for good comments from you. It gives me a purpose in life that I can actually help people. It feels nice!

However, I have social problems and have to deal with current shits by myself right now! Put yourself first before others. Settles your debts before helping others with theirs. If you cannot deal with yourself or taking care of yourself well, what is the point of finding a dream job?

Probably you cannot even get one!

Learn to say the freaking word, “NO”!

Back then in college, I do have a close friend which I am still in contact with until now and she is a good listener.

But the main problem is that I cannot reject her offer or say the word, “No” and listened to my heart all the time. Whenever she requested to go home late after work just because she disliked going back home, I was already physcially tired but did not want to fail her.

Until when we were about to graduate from college, I have decided to change my mindset. If not, when? In future, I will face similar situations and my mental health definitely will not be able to take up much emotional stress just from not being able to say, “No”!

So, I started saying “No” whenever I do not feel right to agree along with my close friend. Of course, she feels angry and annoyed but she gotta take it that way. It was also kinda on her part that no one can actually go along with her at all times anyway.

It is important to say “No” because you have the right to. Instead of taking it all up inside you, you will suffer instead of letting them all out. It will affects you mentally and emotionally. Worst scenario that might happen to you would be suffering from depression.

Life can be tough and exhausting. You can do it and it does not matter how long it takes you to complete your passion and purpose in your life as long as you are taking the steps.

Gradually the winner who works hard will gain it !

Thank you for reading my blog. My name is Wendy! Take care!

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